Summer memories

10 09 2011

I am feeling nostalgic these days. In fact, this feeling has been haunting me for a while. It could also be the end-of-summer blues that strikes me every year… or the fact that I am turning 35 next week. Lately, I often find myself thinking of the past, how I used to be, how I used to feel.

Summer has always been a special time of the year for me. As a child, there was always a road trip with my parents, being it to the beach or to the mountains, my parents would leave in the middle of the night, sometime before dawn my father would carry me from my bed, still asleep, and wrap me in the coziest blanket in the backseat of the car. I would always wake up in time to watch the sunrise, something very special as I never used to do while at home.

I remember lots of great summers and great adventures. I remember the first time I went abroad by myself, I was only 11 years old and I spent a month in another country as part of a school program. That was the beginning of numerous trips, I never stopped traveling by myself after that summer…

Summer of ’96 marked the moment I fell in love for the first time, with a man, with a place, with the feeling of freedom. Summer of  ’97 taught me that, no matter how much planning we do, something unexpected always happens and it could turn our life upside down. I think back of Summer of ’98 and I love the person I was then. I backpacked around Europe by myself and met wonderful people. It was standing on a hill in the Isle of Skye, however, that I realized that during the two plus months of traveling I had met a strong girl, funny, deep, sensitive, passionate and loving… For the first time in my life, I had got to know and, above all, like the real me.

Another fantastic, yet quite crazy summer happened in ’99. After spending most of the hot months working in the town were I went to university and  having a short, yet steamy love affair with a charming, older Englishman, I went traveling again accompanied by whom would become a dear friend. He showed me new places, geographical and emotional, he showed me that no matter how beautiful love is, it always hurts one way or another. He didn’t know this, but he probably knew me better than I knew myself then.

Summer of the year 2000 was a turning point for me. Again, I traveled a lot but this time I stopped in one place and I made it my second home.

Every single summer in my life taught me something, being it positive or negative, like when I lost two of my closest family members in summer 2003…

When I was expecting  my daughter, I promised I would do my best to build happy and unique summer memories for her. Traveling is a very important part of my life and life of our family so, since her very first summer, we took her to different destinations. This year, I decided to introduce something new, something that I hope would make the bond between us even stronger. We backpacked through three countries, just the two of us, and it was such a wonderful experience that I can’t wait to do it again next year.

The end of this summer season carried bitter-sweet feelings. We moved to our new home, to a new town and my baby started her second year of preschool. Soon, I will turn 35 years old and I have to admit I am not taking it well… I love the life I chose for myself, I love being a mother, and a married woman (even though from time to time you might hear me yell say otherwise, especially when the poor hubby does or says something he really really shouldn’t have), but I feel like I am getting old, and this scares me because, on the inside I still crave that passion and freedom that characterized my early twenties…

… does it make any sense?!

Anyway, I will leave you with one of my favourite quotes on growing old…

It is not the years in your life, but the life in your years that counts.”




One response

12 09 2011

Lovely post.

If it makes you feel better, I’m turning 39 in Jan and wish I could crawl under a rock!

Love you honey – you are making brilliant memories for your beautiful girl xx

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